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Draft for Stern's creative essay

No, not mine.

Read Qzoink's draft for the creative essay a NYU. Had me in splits! Still LMAO! Too bad he doesnt blog anymore.

Here's the link: http://qzoink.blogspot.com/2005/10/3-essay.html

And for the lazy unz... pasting it here:

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3: Essay

NYU Stern. Essay Question 3.

Please describe yourself to your MBA classmates. You may use any method to convey your message (e.g. words, illustrations). Feel free to be creative.

Ok, I'll try and feel free.

Scrolling: Menheads - La Politique (Part 1)

Draft 1:

I used to make fried dumplings at an Ethiopian restaurant in Lexington, Kentucky. I now make omelets at a joint in New York, New York. The last three alphabets are consonants. The last three in the name of the joint. Where I make omelets. Spinach, bacon and goat cheese.

Making the switch wasn't easy. It shows I am versatile. I can handle finance and economics together in the same semester. I make each omelet to perfection. It leads to better tips for those who serve it. If I am your MBA classmate in the future, I will do the same. Not the omelet. Homework, or a project. I'll do it to perfection, so that you get a better grade.

Various kinds of humans line up to eat my omelets every Sunday at 11:30 AM. A number of times, I have been given the responsibility of managing the queue. I arrange the humans heightwise, the shortest person in front. That way everyone can gauge how many humans are in front of him/her. It keeps the operation translucent. Although I am a chef by training, I know how to manage humans and do justice to them. As your MBA classmate, I will do similar justice to you. I will let you answer the teacher's question first. I'll even prompt the correct answer.

Time management is key. More so at a joint than at business school. Spinach, bacon and cheese, right? While the chopped bacon is frying in the skillet, the frozen chopped spinach is thawing in the microwave. The microwave has a timer but the skillet doesn't. So I have to keep an eye on it. I have to manage time. It's like managing two subordinates. One goes by the clock. It strikes 5 and she is out. The other keeps working until he burns out. I'll encounter both kinds in my study group or project team. I'll know what to do.

I hope you understand that I will make an all around good classmate. All that I have told you so far is very businesslike. You probably want to know the inner me. You wonder, what's behind that facade of omelets, management and generosity? It's a villager. It's someone who once couldn't believe that spinach can be frozen or that the white of an egg can come in a carton. Someone who was dumbfounded on seeing a whiteboard for the first time and wondered how a white chalk would be legible on it, only to be further dumbfounded on seeing dry-erase markers.

Don't worry, you won't feel awkward around me. Just like you, I now go to the movies and have a small cordless phone that I can use far away from my house. Mine didn't come with a base station though, did yours? Hey, trust me, I will never let you down, I'll make omelets for you, I'll nudge you if you fall asleep in class, and if you still don't wake up, you can have my notes.

I have highlighted my important features above. I am sure you want to know more, but I just realized that you won't be reading this. The admissions committee will, and they have had enough.

Hey, it's brilliant! :) If I were the Adcom, this single essay would be enough for me to make a positive decision, and I am not kidding :)

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